In October 2021, during the pandemic lockdowns, I drove to and from my nursing job past houses decorated with skeletons and gravestones for Halloween. Normally, I find such decorations tacky and a little offensive, but I suddenly thought, yes, we need a reminder of our own mortality. After Halloween, comes the hope of Christmas and then the promise of Easter, but for balance, there needs to be a time to weep and mourn.
Among the Catholics over here there are those whose lives consist of attending every wake and funeral in the city that they can. Dwelling on the fragility of life, desensitizing themselves to the abrupt ending of it all but dwelling in, as you have said, the new knowledge that postdates the person we knew. It is a beautiful practice not understood by many.
That’s very interesting and profound. Most of us in the modern world do all we can to remove ourselves from death and the reality of its presence. Myself included.
Martin Buber might say that it is because we regard death as an I-It; something to be used rather than an I-Thou which does nothing and is nothing but presence.
Death serves us or God who uses death for this or that and so we follow the leader and use death ourselves and if we are using death then we are on the proverbial “right end of the barrel”. If we are using death than we can make it make sense and when we expose ourselves to death it is on our terms until it isn’t.
In 2 Cor. 1:3-4 Paul speaks of comfort originating with God, flowing down onto us from above, doing its healing work, and then flowing out of us to others who need that same balm. I've experienced that comfort in the midst of grief, and it wasn't in the words spoken by friends as much as in their simple presence and the deep bond of love their presence and prayers demonstrated. Our gathering to remember a loved one is an acknowledgment of the miracle that is life, and, hopefully, the gift we have each been given as God has allowed us to live with that person, love that person, perhaps at times be enraged or brought to tears by that person, and perhaps also, to be able reflect on how the image of God was made visible in the life of that person we now miss so very much.
Distracted by many things, I’ve held some grief in my heart. This was the cry I needed. 🧡
💛💛💛
In October 2021, during the pandemic lockdowns, I drove to and from my nursing job past houses decorated with skeletons and gravestones for Halloween. Normally, I find such decorations tacky and a little offensive, but I suddenly thought, yes, we need a reminder of our own mortality. After Halloween, comes the hope of Christmas and then the promise of Easter, but for balance, there needs to be a time to weep and mourn.
Yes! Halloween can be a serious kind of reminder. We need these, don’t we?
Among the Catholics over here there are those whose lives consist of attending every wake and funeral in the city that they can. Dwelling on the fragility of life, desensitizing themselves to the abrupt ending of it all but dwelling in, as you have said, the new knowledge that postdates the person we knew. It is a beautiful practice not understood by many.
That’s very interesting and profound. Most of us in the modern world do all we can to remove ourselves from death and the reality of its presence. Myself included.
Martin Buber might say that it is because we regard death as an I-It; something to be used rather than an I-Thou which does nothing and is nothing but presence.
Death serves us or God who uses death for this or that and so we follow the leader and use death ourselves and if we are using death then we are on the proverbial “right end of the barrel”. If we are using death than we can make it make sense and when we expose ourselves to death it is on our terms until it isn’t.
There is a whole essay in this I can feel it.
In 2 Cor. 1:3-4 Paul speaks of comfort originating with God, flowing down onto us from above, doing its healing work, and then flowing out of us to others who need that same balm. I've experienced that comfort in the midst of grief, and it wasn't in the words spoken by friends as much as in their simple presence and the deep bond of love their presence and prayers demonstrated. Our gathering to remember a loved one is an acknowledgment of the miracle that is life, and, hopefully, the gift we have each been given as God has allowed us to live with that person, love that person, perhaps at times be enraged or brought to tears by that person, and perhaps also, to be able reflect on how the image of God was made visible in the life of that person we now miss so very much.
This was beautiful, Karen. Thank you.